Just because

Paramore- Brick by Boring Brick

Posted by Lams on 8:35 PM

Do you have to ruin everything for me?

Posted by Lams on 12:36 AM

Now you say I cant dance? Like wtf? Bitch, NO Im not quitting dance and I dont care what you say. I love to dance and Im good at it and thats the only time people are assured of my existance, and you're not taking that away from me. 
Two more fucking years, I swear, then you are going to hit the worst days of your life and you will feel horrible, but I wont give a fuck. 

Fuck it. I should just be quiet because I dont help at all.

Posted by Lams on 3:09 PM

Seriously Im hating this son of a bitch Omar now. Fuck him. He pisses me off so much. What does he know? He knows nothing at all and still goes on talking shit. 
I try to stand up for someone I care about and it doesnt fucking make a difference to anyone. Fine Im the bad guy.. Im sorry -.- Are you happy?


And also, so called friends? Yeah this is to the people who fucking made the effort to get so close to me that I got attached and now that Im not there, I dont matter anymore. Thank you.
This is why I hate my 'diplobrat' life. Fuck it all. 
Nothing I ever do makes any difference to anyone, so I will just stop trying and save my own energy. 


Yes, Im a selfish bitch now and yes, I'm weak...I am aware of that. Deal with it. Environment shaped me that way. YES I still stand firmly by my arguement. Sue me bastard.

She doesnt deserve this.

Posted by Lams on 2:52 AM

Noura, I love you and Im always here with you. You dont deserve this pain, or hurt, and you have the right to be pissed off. He needs to show he cares, he needs to treat you like you're the best in the world, because you really are babe. You're worth risking it all. If I could run away, I would and I would come to be with you and wipe your tears. You are my bestie babe and I hate to see you so hurt like this often :( I really wish I could make this all stop. I would do anything to gain that power :(
Just know that I love you and I miss you and I'm always here for you no matter what<3333


While I'm on it, my heart goes out to a few other friends too:
Kj, Ella, Banita, Albie, Sib, Ibige, Leena, Minae, Tash, Farzana, Neela,..<333
IB2- I've found great friends<3


Im always here for you guys, guaranteed^^ and thank you for being here for me too(:
<333 you guys.

I love how you love me and say you care...but honey, who are you kidding? You really dont.

Posted by Lams on 12:23 AM

Injected with your fury inside me,
I burn until my heart turns grey,
my eyes turn black and I slowly fade away.


This hate you send me
could only last so long,
but Im flinching for air as this all goes on.


Dark and black. You hold me down, 
you hold my hand to kill me now. 
You smile, you're eyes still so pure,
with shining guilt but you would never know;
How your angst and pretense makes me scared,
and makes me miss when you were there.
You used to be my life and soul,
but now've you managed to leave me cold. 


So thank you God, for this dear experience,
and for all the other times you've inflicted this pain.
To make me feel like I belong, 
then snatch this thing I had called home. 
Once, twice, thrice the charm,
I guess the first two weren't bad enough but this time, trust me, 
it really did get me, 
it did me harm.